THAT Toy

I'm sure it's true for most parents: your child has THAT one toy that grates on your nerves like no other.

For Carrie, it's the singing toddler table which will randomly sing when no one's around. It's made her jump and/or suspect our house is haunted multiple times.

For me, it's the chainsaw.

Carrie brought home a box of toys from a friend shortly after we moved into our house. There were plastic tools, board games, and the loudest, most annoying, orange-and-blue toy chainsaw ever.

It was love at first sight. The saw revved it's way straight into my little boy's heart. Soon, Shane was chasing me around the house laughing maniacally. Back then, he didn't know how to start it. Whenever the noise stopped, he'd ask me to start it up again.

How's that for adding to your own misery?

I'm fine with the saw for the first couple of minutes.

When Roxy's involved, I'm fine with it for the first 20 seconds until all the barking starts.

Whatever time passes following is gritted teeth and a mental mantra of "He's having fun; let him get the energy out. He's having fun; let him get the energy out. He's hav..."

After my patience is exhausted, I hide the saw. My most successful hiding spots have lasted days.

Shane always spots it.

I have hidden the chainsaw on the top shelf of the garage between paper towel rolls. I have thrust it among hats and scarves and boxes at the top of the clothes closest. It's been under couches, in basement storage closest, on top of the refrigerator or in the backseat of the car.

In the garage: I tarried to take groceries out of the back of the car. Shane saw the saw.

In the closet: Carrie didn't shut the door all the way once. Shane saw the saw.

In the basement storage closet: Our basement flooded. While assessing damage is was put on top of a pile by someone. Shane saw the saw.

My son's eyesight is incredible. If there is a sliver of blue, orange, or gray plastic he picks up on it. It's as if he's constantly scanning. I can't help but be impressed.

It'd be easier to throw the saw away, but I won't. I know I'm the weak link in this scenario. There's nothing physically wrong with the saw and the dog (while she barks) seems to enjoy playing with Shane and it.

In the meantime, the saw hiding sub-plot will continue around here. Maybe I can "accidentally" leave it at Nana's house...