A Tale of Two After Schools

Shane's having a blast when I pick him up from afterschool 4 days out of 5. Monday he was hiding with some of the younger kids.

On a bad day, Shane may have been in trouble for arguing or being inappropriate. Or he may tell me he has no friends, kids are rude, and no one wants to play with him.

Then, on another good day, he'll talk about how he learned how to play sardines. That's where a few kids hide and when you find them you get to hide with them. He went on and on about how amazing that game was!

It's up and down.

Kids are kids. They're not always the nicest and they tend to be ruled by their feelings.

It's mostly up for what's it's worth. It's a good after school program. I think Shane's flair for attention-seeking and dramatic can exacerbate his teachers at times, but I think they're good at what they do.

During the school day seems a little rougher. Shane's mentioned there are "rude kids" on the bus. Shelby, the girl next door, mentioned kids were mean to Shane on the bus, too. He got involved in an incident earlier in the school year (I don't know if I ever posted about it, but I did post a reference to the bus being rough on this one).

Last Monday, Carrie texted me that "Shane got into an altercation at school." She was upset and worried. The principal had called and Shane had been in her office. It sounded like Shane had been upset with someone's behavior, asked for help, and then the other kid wanted to get even. Carrie said that Shane told the principal he had no friends.

We left Shane at school and when I arrived at after school to pick him up he was running around wild, free, and happy. He didn't bring up what happened, so I did instead.

Shane's story sounded less distressing than the narrative that had us worried midday. It went something like this:

Shane's PE class was playing some sort of tag game with pool noodles. The people with the noodles were supposed to tag you out on your legs. One kid was having too much fun whacking people with noodles and whacked Shane on the butt. Shane told him to knock it off and no, he wasn't out because it was too high a hit. I'm a little unclear on how often it kept happening, but Shane eventually went to the gym teacher.

Part two happened after Shane talked to the teacher. The kid with the noodle was mad he got in trouble. It sounded like he pushed Shane, so Shane pushed him back. The kid then tackled Shane to the floor, but got up when the gym teacher told him to knock it off.

And that seemed to be most of it. I wasn't pleased with the situation (and honestly a little annoyed Shane didn't try to sprawl!), but it sounded like Shane tried to do the right thing. Him pushing back helped escalate things, but he didn't get in any trouble at home. We talked about things, he got a hug, and I reminded him what a sprawl was.

It's tough being a kid. I remember some of my own dealings with bullies and kids who didn't like me. I'm glad Shane's in the after school program so that he gets a chance to play with kids from his school outside of the classroom to try and build some relationships that I hope will carry on. He won't be "the new kid" forever. Hopefully, he'll remember how it felt and be kind to any kids who show up new next year.

Afterschool Fun

Shane's normally having a blast whenever I show to pick him up from school.

This week, two days stood out. 

The first, he was wrapped in mats while Peter rolled him across the floor! Shane's legs were hanging out kicking and then his head popped out the other side smiling from ear to hear.

The second, Shane was playing some sort of 'boss' game that kept evolving. He would yell out rules about what would happen if he threw the ball at base and how much HP damage it would do. The other kids mostly seemed to understand and were throwing out some of their own counter rules.

Everyone was smiling. I don't think any adult would have been able to actually follow what was going on, but that's the sort of evolving play I remember loving as a kid.

On the down side, the afterschool teacher wanted to talk to me one day. She'd needed to talk to Shane because he showed his underwear to some of the girls (trying to elicit a laugh or a scream, I know not which). Later that same day, he'd gotten into an argument with another kid and started 'screaming.' When I talked to Shane, his defense was he wasn't screaming he was "loud."

"So, I'm hearing you were yelling."

He agreed to that, but not screaming....which led into a talk about how arguing over a word didn't change the spirit of what happened.

Two steps forward and one step back.

It's all learning.

People don't like to admit it, but we need consequences. I know that I do.

For example, I used to be a lot better about turning in library books. I don't mind paying a fine as I support libraries....but I'd rather avoid it if I can.

Once I found out Shane can get a card without fines I got terrible about turning things in on time. And renewing them.

I know I'm bad about it. I feel bad about being bad about it. But that didn't change my behavior.

Maybe publicly confessing/shaming myself will make me be a little better about it.

And maybe years later Shane will feel the same way about posting he got in trouble for showing off his underwear. If he learns the lesson, this will be a funny story to reminisce on!

Hour of Code

Shane and Clara were working together on Clara's computer when I picked Shane up today. They were both really excited about a dance program they'd made.

I recognized blockly and asked, "Did you all do the Hour of Code today?"

There was a resounding yes!

They were into it. They were using a module I hadn't seen before to make an animation go along with a song. I watched them play around for a little bit before Clara's father came and it was time to go!

Shane wanted to code more at home, so I let him hop on the computer. I gave him some advice and showed him how he could randomize some of the features. He played around for a long while before I kicked him off for the night!