Classics

I'm getting cheaper and cheaper in my 'old age.'

I prefer to think of it as 'efficient' and 'not materially driven,' but I can foresee Shane using the ch- word when he's older (or even skinflint if he has a vocabulary!).

I've discovered there are many free classic ebooks in the public domain. They're not always the type of books I would search out, but they work out great for my current situation. I don't have a lot of time to read, these can fit on my phone, are free, and typically shorter than modern novels.

It can't hurt to get a little culture either.

There was a Dr. Who episode with Agatha Christie, so I decided to read The Mysterious Affair at Styles. Sherlock was always fun, so why not try Poirot?

Honestly, it was not my preferred type of novel. It was clear to me that Agatha weaves a nice, muddy tale. All the characters have their own ideas and agendas and not everything that seems related to the case at hand really is.

I went ahead and picked up Murder on the Oriental Express on Shane and I's last library visit.

Once again, it wasn't the most gripping, page-turner. The conclusion was where Agatha Christie shows she's a master of writing mysteries.

I felt pretty good about myself picking up on or guessing (if I'm generous) a quarter of the facts and idiosyncrasies.

The resolution was such that it was all or nothing. I didn't see it coming.

Some period and linguistic knowledge was present I would never have picked up on, but Ms. Christie does leave clues throughout the entire story. With good reason, the cover exclaimed "Her masterpiece!"

I'm working on The Dubliners right now, but I can't say it's a quarter as amusing. I find it ironic that ages ago an English teacher or professor might have forced me to read these and here I'm doing it because it's free and easy.

Welcome Home, Roxy

Saturday morning, we picked up Roxy.

It's official, she's one of us.

In my opinion, Roxy is "suspiciously good." I keep wondering when the other shoe's going to fall.

Yes, she has puppy energy and would love to chase Max, but that's par for the course.

What we really need is to fix/finish off the fence. Walks in the rain and cold get old fast. It would be nice to throw Roxy's butt out back and let her finish her business at whatever leisurely pace she chooses!

Shane was very excited to visit the "Puppy House" on Saturday. He was only interested in the dogs for the first five minutes before his interest shifted to exploring (I taught him how to crab walk and he crawled in both dog crates).

He's been Hot and Cool towards Roxy since. Sometimes he's gushy and says, "My doggy!" Sometimes he pokes Roxy's ears and giggles uncontrollably. When Roxy plays, Shane will watch, amused by definitely on the sideline. The rest of the time he seems comfortable she's around if not overly interested.

Shane does NOT like getting licked in his face. If Roxy does shoot him a quick kiss, he squeals and fake cries, "She got me!!!"

Thankfully, Roxy isn't a big licker.

I tell Shane to tell her no and "get over it" (basically). Sometimes a cold, wet nose sniffing him will cause a pout, but I don't show much sympathy then. Roxy is extremely well behaved for a puppy (much less one from her circumstances).

As Shane grows older, she'll calm down and I bet they'll be good friends. She can be there for him, love on him, and he can learn how to take care of her.

Carrie may already be dreaming of dog competitions (or at least cool YouTube videos). She's got the will to train and does research when Shane naps. Give her a month and she'll have learned enough to rewrite German Shepard Training for Dummies (side-income!). She's also thrilled to be giving such a sweetheart a second-chance.

I'm happy my family has grown again. Roxy seems like a really good fit. I love her already. She's sweet tempered, playful, obedient, has a non-sissy bark, and passed Carrie's muster.

Welcome home, Roxy. May we be as good or better to you than you are to us.

Dastardly Detoxing!

Plumbing problems and dog dilemmas weren't enough; I managed to get into a caffeine crisis.

Sorry, I seem to find alliteration amusing (see what I did there?).

I was late getting my morning dose and started to get a nasty headache. I love the taste of tea and coffee. With the cold weather onset, I must have over-indulged (even more than usual) and bumped my habit to the next level: addiction.

The headache annoyed me and now I've quit cold-turkey. I felt the withdrawal keenly over the weekend.

Today was the first workday without. I poured myself a cup of juice to fill the void, but it's not the same.

Maybe I'll detox until Christmas and have a nice hot cup to celebrate.

Before I go upstairs to pass out I figured I'd post a quick Shane video to fill the writing void.

I present to you: Shane, Lord of the Dance.

Shane had a few close dizzy calls, but I guess everyone's reactions are slower before the sun comes up.

Any embarrassment to my wife is collateral damage.  Blame the lack of caffeine, Carrie.

I know I do!

Tonight...

Tonight I have a headache and I'm going to turn in. Instead of a write-up I give you a longer than usual video with some reveals in it.

Near Misses

Max misses Carrie.

I'm the only human on hand, so she doesn't care that I'm allergic. She jumped on the back of the couch when I was reading and kept nuzzling my head. Then she followed me upstairs and claimed my chest.

Why do cats always put their butt in your face?

I like that Max has been so affectionate lately. She's a good cat. I do wonder if her tune will change when there's a dog roaming the halls...

I took an allergy pill.

Pray I survive the night.

Pop Post

Pop sent this email the other night. It had a couple of Shane stories I thought I'd share...

Take it away, Pop!

Poop Control

Shane has total bowel control.

Once Shane realized he got rewards for pooping in the potty, he was game.

Then his natural stubborness kicked in. He refused to poop in the potty for a couple of weeks and would yell kick and scream if I tried to sit him on the potty (or interrupt him in a hiding place).

I stayed calm. I held my ground.

Now Shane works the system.

Shane will poop a single turd, clam up, and ask for a reward. Once the reward is done he will run over to the potty and drop another tiny turd. Again and again, he will tell you he's "All done!" and demand to poop again when he wants another reward.

The kid knows exactly what he's doing.

Nana said it took 11 days to potty train me at 2 years old. Shane's almost 3 and he's got the poop down pat, but who's smarter: the boy who learned early or the boy who held out until the adults around him sweetened the deal?

I've had to rework the rules.

Big dumps = lots of YouTube videos + a brownie or some sort of treat.

Little dumps = a little bit of computer time (in direct proportion to the amount of poop)

Dingleberries = one video. Repeated dingleberries get a "Good job!" or maybe another video if it's big enough

Otherwise, the kid would be in front of the computer all day long with a gut backed up with crap.

He's sneaky, too. Shane will run over, pull down his pants, and hop on the toilet without assistance. If you're slow to empty out the dingleberry (because let's say a hyper-active, excited two year old sprints off the toilet half naked to the computer) then Shane will plop down on the toilet, jump up and say "I did it! I pooped!"

That's right, my son is still in diapers, but knows all about how to pull a fast one.

You'd think that bladder control would roll with bowel control, but it hasn't. Shane will pee his pants without a care, but he guards his poops until he wants something and has an audience.

He's started to work his scam over at Nana and Pop's. They used to offer him toys for going on the potty, but the number of poops Shane takes in a day has skyrocketed. Shane came home yesterday with a fancy helicopter.

"It was expensive!" Nana said.

I arched an eyebrow.

"To someone." She ammended and smiled. Nana loves garage sales!

We've made progress, but I think I need to read another book on potty training. Otherwise, my son is going to put Nana and Pop in the poor house and learn how to use a mouse and keyboard before I want him to.

Home Alone

Carrie is in Indianapolis for training. Shane is spending the night at my parents and set to visit Carrie's parents on the morrow. The dog isn't here yet and I'm....

Home Alone!

You'd think I'd be on vacation, but it's a bit lonely. In my head I'm more independent, but in reality it turns out I'm quite the family man. I miss them already. I get a lot of my energy and joy from my wife and child. I don't even watch TV unless Carrie is around to watch it with.

I would have gone over to my parents to visit and see Shane tonight, but I went home to meet the water damage restoration people at 4:30 PM. I proceeded to sit around downstairs for the next three hours. The fans were so loud I didn't want to leave the door area in case they came and I didn't hear.

Thankfully, they did come at 7:30 PM. All of the fans are gone. The basement was proclaimed "dry!" and the next step is to contact a contractor.

That's for tomorrow. I've spent enough time on the phone today between family and insurance.

Plot Lines

The real world is one convoluted mess of plots.

Whenever Carrie and I watch our nightly episode or I read a book I'm reminded: fiction stories are clean. There are normally a few plots intertwined, but resolution usually comes in a timely manner. Some threads may be left open for the future (cliffhangers and sequels!), but the number of threads is kept low enough that people can follow along.

Neat and tidy.

I'm probably pretty annoying to watch TV and movies with, because I like to try and predict what's going to happen. I'm also pretty good at it (which would make me more annoying!).

Real life follows no such guidelines.

Perhaps that's why so many people seem lost in it. It's big, it's huge, it doesn't have to make sense, usually doesn't, and sometimes does at the most seemingly random times.

Everyone is the main character in their own story, supporting characters (of varying depth) in the stories of everyone they know, and extras in the background of anyone the meet or have any sort of influence on.

Every time you've ever grabbed the last of something off a store shelf you've created a conflict in someone else's story. It could be the worn-out retail worker doing inventory, the stressed mother looking for Teddy Grahams, or some kid who wanted a snack.

Of course, the most important story to anyone is the one they're currently in.

Hopefully, it's the one they're living.

In my own life, I have dog-to-be, a growing boy, a happy marriage, my wife's job switch, plumbing problems, chores, work (and all the thousands of little stories that makes), friend stories, family stories, and things I want to do (like post my thoughts on a blog....).

I've never really stopped thinking "I'll write again one day," so I still think about this stuff from time to time.

I like to think.

You're only bored if you're not trying.

The Plumbing Problem Continues

"That's about the dumbest place they could have put it," the man said.

He worked for County Water, and it was a big tree.

A big tree that was planted decades ago directly over our water main.

It's grown since. The roots jut out of the ground and weave gnarled paths I have to steer the mower around. I've dug into them when gardening along the house. The mattock worked wonders when smaller tools could not prevail.

Carrie wanted to remove the tree before, but I said "next summer or spring."

Now that we have a leaking water main under it and a "fix in 14 days or we shut off your water" notice it's not going to wait.

Sherry, the plumber, was right.

Carrie collected quotes on what it would take to dig up and fix the leak. Insurance won't cover any excavation (aka fixing). The pipe is four feet down and under a tree and it's impossible to tell where the leak(s) could be without digging it all up.

The quote I heard was $5775.

Ouch.

There were others and we'll get a few more tomorrow. The quote in question involved running a new line to save time and money through bypassing the tree entirely.

Pop already loaned me his chain saw, so I'm thinking about going to work on it tomorrow. Carrie and Shane will be out of town and I'll need to keep myself busy. It may as well be doing something useful!

I need to talk more to our neighbors as well. The had a pipe burst in their yard last year. We talked to them today and heard that their other neighbor had a pipe burst on her the year before! That's three houses in a row.

My neighbor, Sheryl, said that the county had done some road work and then the pipes started busing. It could be coincidence since the houses on our street were all built at a similar time, or it could be being caused by something. Sheryl said something about the new copper pipes could be changing the pressure (I guess she heard it from the man who fixed her yard?), but I didn't really understand what she was saying.

I did clue in when she said "if two or three houses in a row get the same problem, maybe I'll talk to a lawyer." I'm not planning on moving for years to come, so we'll see where that goes down the line.

Sheryl and Lisa said they think the guy they used last year was cheaper than our quote, so we're going to keep shopping around.

Some of the damage in the basement (my guitar amp, the queen-sized futon, etc) will take a bite out of whatever we do pay. I like to think of it as we're stream-lining. Less junk to pay less for repairs.

I'm thankful that I have this sort of problem and not a "What will my family eat tomorrow" type of problem. Puts stuff in perspective, doesn't it?

Maybe I'll solve someone's "How will I put my kid through college" problem by picking them to fix the pipe!