He's So EASY!

Every babysitter tells me, "[Shane] is so easy!"

I love hearing people love on my child, but another part of me thinks "if only you knew!"

Shane views me as the authority figure in the house, and he doesn't like it. Sometimes, you can see the gears working in his head. I'll tell him "No hit kitty." He'll look at me, raise a hand, and slowlllly creep towards the cat. It's his way of asking "Where's the line? Is it here?" He'll push a little farther. "What about here?"

I try not to get sucked in to more battles than I should, but when Shane tries to stomp on a cat or put a chair on a table so he can jam a stick into the ceiling fan I don't feel like I have a choice. I'll let him fall off a couch or poke a finger on a thorn outside. I will move the end table with corners away from the couch, and I will make sure Shane doesn't run into the thorns at a sprint, but natural consequences are better teachers than I.

Then there's the "Who's the boss?" game. Shane asks me for something (like milk). I get it and then Shane throws a fit saying "He doesn't want it!" He'll cry, run out of the room, and he's recently said "You no love me!" He's smart enough to be manipulative - that's a blessing and a curse. He's not shy about communicating, either. Yesterday, I asked "Do you want to go to Home Depot?" He replied. "NO! I want to go Home Depot with Mommy!" He was pissed when I told him Mommy was at work.

This morning there was a 20 minute on and off scene when I brought Shane's cup out without a top. I've put a top on his cup only a few times in the past couple of weeks, but he was extra offended today. He wanted a top. He needed a top!. Tears gushed. "Daddy go away! I sad! I crying!" He ran out of the room, banged on a table in the sunroom, and demanded juice. "I no like warm milk! I no want warm milk!" he shouted. I said, "You asked for milk. Daddy made you milk" and did my best to ignore.

Eventually Shane settled down, snuggled in next to me and drank his milk. "I like warm milk!" he said. ::Sarcasm:: Gee, I never knew ::/sarcasm::. It's all in a day's parenting.

Another classic example is when I offered Shane whipped cream from a milkshake at Chic-Fil-A a couple of weeks ago. He dropped to the ground yelling "I don't want it! I don't like it!"

He demanded I buy something else. Of course, I said, "No."

He cried, so I picked him up off the floor and took him to a table. I kept a calm voice and asked again "Do you want some ice cream, please? It's yummy!"

Shane said "NO! I no like whip cream!" and whipped his head back and forth. He struggled to hop up and run away.

A man who looked like he enjoyed his Chic-Fil-A was trying not to laugh. I smiled, shrugged, and put a dab of whip cream on my finger. I tapped it on Shane's lips and you know what happened next? He opened his mouth as wide as he could and looked at me. He just sat there calmly with an open mouth.

The man lost it. He started cracking up and apologized (I don't blame him - I thought it was funny enough to share online!). I gave Shane a scoop of whipped cream and he opened up for more. Shane smiled, looked at me and said "I like whip cream! Ahhhh!"

I love my son, but sometimes Shane wears me out and frustrates me something fierce. I'm a patient man, so it rubs at me when I feel like I'm being impatient with my own son. Then I feel guilty, because he's my son! I should be extra patient with Shane! That leads to guilt, and guilt doesn't build an attitude called patience.

I'm sure Shane feels the same way about me. I must go from lovable and caring to frustratingly dense whenever I won't do whatever he wants : ).  Sometimes, we just need a break from each other.  He's so thrilled and excited by new things and new people that he becomes adorable. Whoever's watching him tells me how "easy" and "wonderful" my son is and I smile. He's certainly wonderful, but he isn't always easy!