Saturday, February 2, 2013

Shane's Name

Shane's middle name was not always "Finnegan."

It was almost his first name.

From the start, Carrie said that if we had a girl her name would be "Kaylee."

I agreed on the condition that I could name any boys whatever I wanted (like "Major Major").

Carrie agreed.

When we learned we were going to be blessed with a boy, I learned that it was a 'conditional' agreement (AKA if she didn't like what I picked I had to re-pick until she did like it!).

We were able to agree quickly on a set of rules. At first, I liked Finlay and Finnegan. I like to think of nicknames when I think of names, and I thought 'Finn' would be a good nickname for my future boy.

Eventually, Carrie and I agreed on Shane. At the time, it almost felt like we were just picking a name, but the more we said it the more it became Shane's name and felt 'right.' Carrie suggested Shane's middle name be Finnegan, but I refused. In my head, I thought that maybe my second son could have that name.

Shane's middle name was set to be Malcom.

It stayed that way until after he was born.

The delivery was hard on Carrie. It was very scary for me, too, and after I saw what my wife went through I released the name.

Up until that point, I had been 'saving' the name Finnegan for a future child. My wife was a hurt (yet joyful) mess after Shane's birth and I did not feel that I could ask her to go through that again.

Carrie knew that I originally wanted a large family. We talked about things like that before we were engaged.

She understood when I asked to change Shane's middle name.

The name, Finnegan, felt meaningful to me since the beginning and by giving him both of the names I wanted I  signaled I was putting all of my love and hope of a family into Shane.

I don't regret the decision either.

The name fits.

Shane Finnegan is my son.

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