Hooray for horse riding lessons! Carrie and Shane rode together Friday morning.
Carrie turned Shane loose in the arena and said, "Walk around on your own while I get Eddy ready."
That surprised me. I don't think Shane realized the magnitude of that statement, either.
Carrie leans heavily toward caution in nearly all things. To say "on your own" to Shane on a horse was a step for her as much as him (It's also a sign of how much she trusts Maddie!).
I kept an eye out from the barn and watched as Shane steered Maddie over every single pole and obstacle he could find.
"Make sure you do some basic laps, too!" I said. "You don't want to frustrate her before you even start!"
Shane's a lot like me in that. I'd have done the same.
It took Carrie longer than I expected to get ready, but she brought Eddy out to join in.
They walked around the arena for a bit together.
The big lesson there seemed to be "Don't let Maddie cut corners." Carrie wanted Shane to follow her with Eddy and occasionally Shane or Maddie would take a shortcut and come right up on Eddy's butt.
Then Carrie had me open the gate and they went for a trail walk.
Again, I was surprised. Carrie didn't ask me to go with them.
In the past, she's wanted me to walk alongside.
So I stayed at the barn, did some work, and then came out to take some long range pictures as they came along the road.
They turned around and went back along the far path.
I stayed near the front of the property with Loki and opened up the gate (Heidi and Micha were en route).
I couldn't hear much of what was going on, but I did hear some raised voices on occasion. Shane seemed to have trouble with Maddie's brakes every now and again.
Carrie would stop and Shane wouldn't. It'd look like he was trying to do something, but he wasn't telling Maddie the right way ("It's always the trainer's fault for whatever the horse does." Carrie training philosophy)
I heard, "Turn her around!" on this pic and that's what Shane did.
I pointed out Eddy on the trail to Heidi and Micha when they arrived. Heidi was happy to see her boy out exercising and helping!
The trail ride finished shortly after Heidi and Micha's arrival. There was a little debriefing in the arena.
Shane came in looking a little down. Carrie's biggest feedback was, "You can't drop the reigns." She thought that would be a good focus for the next lesson.
Shane was frustrated, though. He had told her his hands got sweaty with riding and the reigns were just too slippery, etc. Then whenever she said not to make excuses he'd do the dramatic collapse in the saddle which would set Carrie to saying "You can't do that one a horse!" and he's start whining....
So I reinforced the positive up at the house.
I asked Shane how he felt about the ride and listened for a bit. Then I said something like, "I was really surprised how much Mommy trusted you to ride on your own in the arena. She must think you're getting better."
That made him stop and think. After a little bit I also brought up, "...This is the first time you've gone a trail walk and Mommy didn't ask me to come for safety. With as careful as she is, that's a sign you're definitely doing better."
By the end of it, I said something like, "Make sure you pay attention to what's happening as well as what's being said. Yes, Mommy is going to tell you what you need to fix. It takes time and effort to be a good rider, but she has you doing more each time. That shows she thinks you're getting better."
"AND I heard her say it," I said. "Some people will lie and tell you whatever you want to hear. Mommy's not like that. She's likely to tell you exactly what you need to fix, so if she says 'You're getting better,' you must really be getting better."
And that's one of the reasons parenting is much easier with two. I was objective while Carrie and Shane talked. I saw things she was communicating that he didn't. Then I was able to bring it back up and make him look at it again whereas if Carrie had brought up how much better he was doing his brain might have snapped straight to the reigns.
Whatever Shane thought at first, Carrie was happy with how he did. She started to talk to me about making sure he had riding gloves next time "because in this heat his hands are sure to get sweaty." Then she went on about how when she was a kid a different kind of reign helped her to keep her grip when she had the same problem. She had one and wanted to swap it in next time.
Carrie's goal in all this is not to turn Shane into an expert level rider. She wants him to know how to play around and be safe, so that we can do a family trail ride and trot around without anyone falling off. Any more than that will depend on him.
I'm her other project. I'm pretty behind schedule, too! Right now, she's focused on trying to bulletproof Pockets so she can dump me on him like she can prop Shane up on Maddie!
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