Summer Goals Update

Summer goals were posted here.

The death of Kitsune wildly curved the predicted path of this summer. Instead of Carrie being joyful and busy at the barn, she's been grieving. I've supported her and Shane's went off on adventures to keep the house quieter as Carrie processed. He's home now for what will (probably) be a quieter stretch.

Some things got done.

Me - 

1. I got a month behind on the blog again. Whoops. Working to rectify that. Carrie took Shane to Busch Gardens twice and I'm within a couple weeks of being up to date.

2. I have been practicing Spanish, but not studying. I'm only doing one iTalki lesson a week instead of two. My teacher doesn't me homework, so it's basically an hour a week chatting. I haven't done much Busuu or book work at all. I have switched to doing my daily Bible reading in Spanish instead of English. I listen as I read to try and train my ear, as well. I'm on Day 50 of the plan....., but I should be on Day 57. Not bad, but I haven't been able to keep up, either.

3. I waited 3.5 weeks, but I did start to exercise again. I do chores, so being active isn't an issue. Performing at an athletic level, though? I've lost it. I haven't done muscle training since I hurt myself last labor day. The last run logged in Runkeeper was September 27th! I ran a lap around the property without stopping (0.47 miles in 3:52). Then I did some pull ups and push ups (3 sets w/2 mins rest - 7&12, 7&15, 5&12). It wasn't that much of a routine, but I managed to make myself nauseous. I did it a few more times and I haven't done it again since. Yup. I failed to establish a routine.  

5. I beat Fire Emblem! Carrie's a big fan, so she watched me beat the final boss.....and then had me start a new game+! She wanted to keep watching my play. She's beat it 5 times, so we got our money's worth out of it. I haven't played since, though. I haven't done too much with video games this summer outside of playing with Bill.

4, 6, and 7. Carrie's processing Kitsune's loss occupied most of my time in the beginning. We watched a lot of TV (Anime, Ms. Marvel, Critter Fixers, etc). We played some cards, she made ice cream, and generally we spent a lot of time together. When I snuck off, I vegged out rather than read or write.

And then we got a puppy.

Now, I'm splitting my time between Carrie, Shane, and Kila. I stay busy! I'm thankful to have a family, though. I'd hoped to visit NOVA by now, but I've enjoyed the time spent with my family.  

8. I feel like I'm recovering. I've had more energy and been more restless about doing something. I didn't always do that something at the beginning when Carrie's mood was more depressed, but I've been busy-busy since Shane and Kilah came home from camp. 

As for Shane -

I haven't made him do squat behind the usual. We haven't started an exercise program, extra Japanese, keyboarding, or anything to fill the extra summer time. I did take him to the pool during the week he was home and tried to do stuff with him while managing everything else. I had planned to go with him to SC to see Megan and her kids, but he ended up going on his own. It gave him lots of extra cousin time and happy memories even if they were without me. He went to Triple R camp next, got a new puppy, and then went to VBS for a week. We had a few boring days, but then we were back in SC again to help Matt move! I worked, but he played the whole time (and got to play Breath of the Wild on the ride home!). I feel like it's been a fun summer for him! That means it's successful.

As for Carrie - 

Eowyn's baby, Kitsune, defined the start of the summer, but not in the way expected. Carrie's spent the whole time processing and healing. She's more functional now, working on things, and appears normal when things are going well. When something goes wrong, though, you see that she her reservoirs of patience are dry. She didn't speak to anyone she considered a friend for the first couple of weeks. The first time she left the house for something social was when we went to Grandma and Grandpa's before dropping Shane off at camp. While that didn't go swimmingly, it seemed to break the dam somewhat. Carrie started talking to them more and then other people afterward. 

Why did Kitsune die?

I don't have an answer. I believe that God works all things for the good of those who love him. Therefore, if it's not good yet, it's not done. 

Would Kitsune have developed health issues that were financially crippling? If he had been healthy, would Kitsune have tripped on some trip somewhere and caused Carrie to be injured or die somewhere on the timeline? Would Carrie make an idol out of him? I can't see the future or the heart, so I have none of those answers. God weaves things for the good of everyone, so what about Shane? Was he supposed to see me support Carrie? Will he remember this time period at some point in his future life when someone else he loves is grieving? Was the hard time for Carrie and me? We've been through difficult times and I feel that those times can strengthen the security of a marriage if handled correctly (Here's to hoping we did it right!). Or will Carrie meet someone in the future going through a similar time? Will Carrie say, "I know exactly how you feel," and be able to save a person's life? I will mention the loss at the beginning of the school year to my students. Will that lead to conversations to help change lives? Mine or theirs?

The questions are limitless, but the course is clear: Forward in faith with love.