The Switch Incident

Carrie's warned Shane repeatedly to be careful with the Switch. I've warned Shane repeatedly to be careful with the Switch.

So I was highly annoyed when I was the one to drop the Switch.

Yeah....I couldn't believe it either.

Shane and I were getting into the car and leaving the pool. I was holding a bunch of his stuff and mine which included the Switch. It slid out as I opened the car door, fell, and chipped a corner of the screen.

I didn't curse, but I know I said something like "You've got to be kidding me!"

On the ride home, Shane asked, "Are you going to tell Mom?"

"Yes, of course."

"Won't she be mad?"

"Yes, of course."

It ended up being a good time for a lesson. It came down to I knew Carrie would be upset and I didn't want her to be upset, especially at me, but I needed to tell her. It was the right thing to do and, though painful now, would be the best thing in the long run. 

"What do you think will happen if I don't tell her?" I asked. We talked for a little bit and I said, "Who do you think she'll blame if she finds it chipped later?" 

That got Shane thinking.

And Shane got to watch it play out. I came in, made sure Carrie was stressed over something else so that one more thing would send her over the edge, and then told her I'd dropped the Switch.

Predictably, she was upset. 

It turned out God smiled on me and only the screen protector was chipped. Carrie ordered a pair of new ones. She replaced the chipped one and the Switch is fine.....but hopefully, Shane learned something about character from all of it. 

Bare minimum, he learned that he's not the only one who screws up in the house.

A Sour Note

The pool was a huge blessing over the summer. Sadly, it ended on a sour note.

The 2nd to last time we went to the pool, Shane called a kid "fat," made the kid cry, and nearly started a fight.

I saw parts of it, but for some of it I was too far away to hear. I heard from Shane and I heard from the other boy's dad, so this is probably close to what happened.

Shane said he got a "bad look" from the other boy. He said he didn't know why. They were both in 'the well' (deep-end), on the same side of the pool, and maybe 15 feet apart. The boy was alone, but there were other kids behind Shane.

Shane replied to the bad look by talking to himself and calling the boy "fat." Possibly multiple times.

The boy didn't hear Shane (I think), but the boy's sister who was right behind Shane heard him badmouthing her little brother.....and her little brother had been bullied over the summer about his weight.

She went straight into defense mode and started yelling at Shane. I heard something like "I could punch you in the nuts" clearly from the picnic tables. 

I was watching by that point and saw the sister yelling and out of the pool. There were lots of other adults around that end of the pool and multiple lifeguards, so I waited to see what would happen.

Shane looked smug or at least snarky. He swore he was trying to do his "straight face," but he had his head above water, eyes partly closed. and facing away. The girl, still obviously pissed, used her foot to step on his head and dunk him for a second. I almost jumped up, but that was the extent of it.

The brother and sister got out of the pool and went to their parents. The lifeguard made Shane sit in time out on the other side of the pool. Sid motioned to me and I went over to talk to him and the lifeguard. They told me what they knew and I said I would have Shane talk to me once he'd served his time-out (Basically, I wanted to reinforce the lifeguard's authority, let Shane face his consequences, and have some time to think!). 

Shane looked miserable in time-out as he should have. 

When he was done, the lifeguard told him to get up and that was when I made him come talk to me.

I didn't have to lay on the guilt too heavily, because Shane seemed aware he'd done wrong. He tried to say that people call him names sometimes like dumb, but I didn't let him excuse-splain his way out or try to lessen that he'd made fun of another kid. I asked him how it felt when older kids made fun of him, he responded, and then I pointed out he was the older kid calling names in this case. 

I remember fragments of what I said as I talked to make Shane empathize with the kid and realize how his words could hurt. He cried.

I know I mentioned "Calling someone fat can be fighting words," and "If you can't say something to someone's face you shouldn't say it" (and even if you could say it, doesn't mean you should either!).

The brother, sister, and their mom left at some point in that time window. I don't remember when. I would have made Shane march over and apologize right then and there if they'd been around.

I kept Shane out of the pool for a while in time out with me. He seemed genuinely beat up and repentant. 

And then I made Shane get back in the pool 5 minutes before break.

He'd wanted to go home. He was ashamed and embarrassed. I told he should be both, but that he couldn't mope forever either. He needed to go out and be kind to some of the other kids before we'd go home.

Sometime when Shane was away, the boy's dad arrived. He offered his hand and introduced himself, and said "I heard our boys had a problem."

So we talked. I told him what happened as I understood it. I said Shane was wrong to say what he said, and had cried while we talked it over and I kept him out of the pool. I told the man I intended to make Shane apologize the next time he saw his son. At one point, the man said he would've been more upset if I'd run over yelling. I told him I was glad no one was hurt and held no grudge especially since Shane was the one who said the first words.

We talked for a bit, shook hands, and then he left seeming satisfied. I think I summed things up at some point saying that I hoped "it was a learning experience for everyone. Your son will learn that his sister will look out for him, and my son will learn to watch what he says." 

It gave Shane and I more to talk about when he got out of the pool. 

One thing that had come up, was the man didn't see the need to apologize for his daughter dunking Shane (he brought it up, not me). He said he expected his daughter to stick up for her brother and that he'd taught his kids "Talk shit, get hit." I told Shane that I didn't agree with that philosophy as a Christian ("Turn the other cheek," and all), but that it would be a common philosophy in the area. I want to speak words that build like in Ephesians, or to speak life like in the Toby Mac song.

I wrote this post in my head many times over the next several days. I prayed about the situation and made Shane pray about it to. I told him he'd have to apologize and he said he "didn't want to/was afraid to" partly because it was hard and he was embarrassed. I told him he had to if he wanted to start the healing process. If not, things tend to fester and it's better to make friends than enemies. I brought up the dropped Switch incident (Which I didn't write about? Oops).  

Whether the boy accepted the apology right away or not, Shane needed to what he needed to do: Apologize.

So I was disappointed when no one was at the pool when we went our final Sunday. I'd wanted to clear the air before the pool closed for the season.

Sid was there and I told him that. He seems to know everyone, so I hoped word would get around that Shane had come with that intention.

So I leave this post with the situation not resolved to my satisfaction. I would have preferred for Shane to apologize. I would have loved for him to apologize and make a friend. As is, the dads talked and the other guy (I think he said his name was Josh) should know I hold no grudge and intend to make Shane apologize. I guess it will have to wait until next summer, though.

Writing this reminds me that I should make Shane pray about it all over again at bedtime prayers. It's been a while, but since it happened, but that doesn't mean it should be forgotten. Myself, I pray that Shane learned many valuable lessons about the power of words, empathy, and forgiveness.

The First School Weekend and a Celebration!

We made it through our first week of school and into a morning of barn chores! Shane scooped poop and I got to scrub the ponies' water trough.

Carrie was busy prepping for launch with Laura and Barbara.

Laura has been raring to go off property on a trail ride and today was the day.

Carrie didn't ride with them, but she organized and drove the expedition forth.

They came back hours later, tired and happy.

I quickly took a picture of the traditional victory walk back to the barn.

They didn't go far. Just to Kim's place up the road, but a victory is a victory.

Carrie, Shane, and I went into town for lunch to celebrate the weekend on our own.

We weren't celebrating school or the trail ride, though. We were celebrating Carrie's birthday!

We saw these folks on the road Sunday after church.

They wanted to celebrate Carrie's birthday, too!

We met up at what's become our traditional Hibachi meetup. The last time we'd been there was when Chris and Rachel were visiting before the pandemic (They've since moved to California!). 

As always, Shane was an easy (and fun!) target for the chef.

He was raring to see the onion volcano!

When we got home, I took Shane to the pool one last time for the season. We were the only people there, unfortunately.

I'll have more to say about that in another post.

For now, we had a weekend with stuff to do even if there weren't a lot of other kiddos involved. Shane got his kid time in during the school week. I think he had enough entertainment and enough rest, but with just enough boredom he'll be excited for class on Monday.

One Last NOVA Run...

The Saturday before classes started, I made one last trip up to NOVA. I went alone. Carrie and Shane went to a birthday party at Sarah's house (More on that on a future post about another birthday!).

My first stop was to check in on John. He's still not doing well. He doesn't return calls or texts, so unless I hunt him down and trap him at work I'm unlikely to see him.

If he lived closer, I could risk driving over randomly to see if I could catch him at home. However, 2.5 hours (plus any traffic) is too far to risk missing him and having to return home. Please keep him in your prayers.

I had another reason to drive up this time, though.

The Jeffers were celebrating Ben's birthday! Hooray for Spider-Ben!

Bill and Jill drove in from NJ. Bill had hoped I'd entice John to visit, as well, but he "went home to do more paperwork." 

I stayed for several hours talking and hanging out. The Jeffers are a personal example of how it can be sad to drift away by not staying in touch.

They're also a good example of  it's great to get back in touch with people you haven't seen in a long while!

I enjoyed crashing the party. I was the only non-Jeffers in attendance. Dan and Shar didn't fly in from Las Vegas so I didn't get a chance to see them, but I ate a burger or two in their stead. 

With school starting, I won't visit NOVA again for a while. Being in school and around students all day will make me a higher risk for germs, so I don't plan to travel much. Besides, school, family, and the barn consume nearly all of my time and energy. I haven't seen Marcus, Bill, or Dan online since Spring when I last played some online games with them and Briggs.

I'm glad I took the chance and drove even if it was solo. Carrie said Shane loved the party, but she was "social-ed out!" (They had a small pool which the kids played in and that put her on edge the whole time, but she let Shane play!).

Free Dinner? Sure!

The Principal, Rick, sent out an email Thursday. "Free dinner for staff and their families! It's at this address."

The address happened to be our church!

It felt weird walking in. I remembered the announcement on Sunday that the church planned to support teachers. I'm a teacher, but being a member I wondered if I shouldn't collect, since I was supposed to be giving! It made it feel weird walking in. I wasn't sure if I'd be recognized, but the masks make that a little more difficult. 

It was a free meal from the church I tithe to, so I guess I indirectly paid for it? It cost me 30 minutes of added travel and waiting to my commute, but it was a blessing dinner was taken care of. No dirty dishes, either! 

I texted Scott about the free dinner, but when he arrived they'd run out of food. More was on the way, but it turned out there was quite the demand. 

One More Thing to Remember...

Fall is approaching and I'm thrilled for it. 

It shouldn't feel hot standing out for a bus unless school's about to end for the year. Carrie was tired, so Shane and I went to the bus stop on our own while she snoozed unaware.

I was unaware, but Shane and I forgot something important. Maybe you noticed from the picture...

I realized our goof as the bus driver pulled up. Hmmm...she's wearing a mask....Wait. A mask? A mask!

Thankfully, the bus driver had spares. The house is too far away to run back to and the bus holds up traffic. Shane had a spare in his backpack, but the driver offered before I was halfway into it so we used hers. Lesson learned....at least, it was learned after one more oops the following week (which I did grab the spare from Shane's backpack before the bus pulled all the way up!). 

It's been 4.5 weeks since school started and those were our only two slip ups (so far).

My Start of School (2021-22)

School started with a whisper for me. 

Materially, I was ready. I had my classroom setup, my computer, and spare masks.

I even bought stickers as a possible bribe (Some students like to decorate their laptops).

I'd make blank copies of tessellations students could draw on and help decorate the room if they were done early or stressed.

Neither of which I've used. Those were a swing and a miss as far as inspirations go.

My first block of the day was planning, though. After that there was a "Mustang Morning" remediation period I, also, had planning for! The first two hours of the day there were students all over the building except in my classroom.

I worked on trying to clean out and fix the wheels on my chair.

My classroom was still full of Psychology stuff. All of the papers are still around a month later (and no one's leafed through any of them! Even me!).

I wanted to turn the bookshelf into a boardgame shelf for decoration (and hopeful future playing), but it was still full of Psych books.

The day itself went well once kids did arrive. For the most part they were too quiet. I was sure that'd change as they settled in (and boy did it!).

After two days of school, I think my A days will be the hardest. The kids are louder, I have lunch duty on Wednesdays, and the schedule is far from ideal. I get the morning off (nice!), but then I have to work straight through most of the day without breaks (not worth the morning off!). The bathrooms in blue hall are locked, so I have to power walk down to Green in the 5 minutes between class if I need to use the bathroom between 12:38 to 3:50 PM.

School lets out at 3:50 PM, but traffic is such a mess I didn't leave until around 4:15 PM each day. It was easier to let all the teenage drivers, parents, and school buses clear out. 

I made it home before 5 PM each day and got to relax a little before chores!

Carrie's solo on morning chores with Shane and I in school. We've picked up whatever slack with poop scooping she's left us each night.

I'm trying to reuse as much as I can from last year, but I've already started tweaking and modifying everything. It's a different year! Only a few days in, that was obvious! 

Everything is off to a good start so far. I'm glad we're back in person. There are some teachers saying "We'll never last," but I'm cautiously optimistic. Supposedly, ~75% of the kids are vaccinated. There are some who are sloppy with dropping their masks, but the vast majority don't seem to need reminders (That may change!).

And that's the start of things for me! More to come!

Back To School Dye (You thought I'd say Day...)

I didn't realize Shane's hair would turn green while I was at work.

He and Carrie played with hair dye while I was away!

She got him a My Hero shirt, too!

I wasn't a fan. "Do you want him to be weird on the first day of school?"

Then again, Shane's already pretty weird, so I guess it's kinda normal (You could even say he gets it from me...).

So...not a fan of the hair dye, but Shane and Carrie had some fun and had a bonding moment (Shane probably likes the green hair more knowing I was surprised!).

In return for his green hair, Shane helped Carrie with hers. I don't know how much he really helped, but that's what I was told.

They're both happy with the results!

We walked out as a family to the bus stop on Monday.

Carrie packed Shane's bag with an emergency mask, an emergency dollar for snacks, and all the other necessities. I tagged along to chronicle the event.

I present to you Shane of the Green Hair for the school year 2021-22!

We had to wait less than 10 minutes for the bus to show.

And Shane was off!

Shane came back with good reports. He enjoyed being around other kids again! He was tired, but looking forward to Day 2!

Going Back to School - Teacher Workdays 2021

They moved my classroom the week before school started. I went from downstairs Purple to upstairs Blue. The only way they could have moved me further would have been to put me in the gym or to drop a trailer in the back parking lot (and those don't arrive until November!).

I wasn't happy with the move, but I know why the did it. They wanted me to have a larger classroom, so they could cram more kids in and still meet COVID spacing requirements. My original classroom was better suited for smaller Algebra classes.  I liked the people and the location (and the limit on how many kids could fit!), but my wants weren't their needs. 

So now I'm amongst the prestigious HMSA classrooms. There's a glass door that separates us from the rest of the school.

It's not so bad. I spent a chunk of the week moving stuff from my old classroom and setting up the new.

I took a bunch of pre and post pictures, but I'll skip to the final product and save you from a week of work.

New to the room (and my experience) was a one-way mirror. You can see partially see through it when the lights are off.

Not so much when the lights are on.

On the other side, the Biology teachers store brains, hearts, kidneys, livers, and all sorts of other interesting things that smell terrible (Supposedly, it's the preservative solutions). 

The room used to be for Psychology, so there's the names of famous psychologists posted all around. Apparently, there used to be portraits, too. I'm hoping someone will take the random filing cambinets and psychology papers, because I have no need of them.

There's a creepy face painted on one of the trashcans, too. I don't think it was meant to be creepy, but it is. It screams that there was something more than math going on amidst my decorations.

I left Friday with the room ready for students.

I even did some light decorating outside to say "This is not HMSA. This. Is. GEOMETRY!"

You can tell I had no ladder. Otherwise, I might have decorated above the door, as well!

I'm as ready as I'll ever be for students. I'll have more to say once I've seen them!